Monday, November 13, 2006

At Spider-Man and Fade's party celebrating the end of the Civil War, I decided now was the perfect time to have a little chat with the Henchman, a would-be super-villain who stole my girlfriend, Maggie, while I was off-planet performing an heroic mission with Jon the Intergalactic Gladiatior at the request of the Queen of the Galaxy.

"Listen, gramps," he started as I approached him, "if I even think I feel you trying to get in my head, I'll show all the fun Maggie and me have had."

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I supressed my laugh. As if he could ever detect my use of telepathy on him. "Now look here, Henchman. There's no need to take that tact."

"Oh yeah? Well I'll take whatever tact I want, Baldy. If you don't watch your step, I'm going to fry you up and have you for breakfast, lunch and dinner."

"Er . . I'm not quite sure what the means."

"It means whatever I want it to!"

"Okay, look Henchman, just calm down a moment. All I want to-"

"You don't tell me to be calm! I'll be whatever the hell I want to be!"

"This is obviously going nowhere," I said. "Perhaps I'll try again when you're feeling a little more relaxed."

I turned my chair around and rolled away. I heard a loud squeel behind me. Apparently I had rolled over his foot by accident. In a furious blur, Henchman jumped in front of me and grabbed my jacket collar.

"That does it!" he roared.

Everyone at the party stopped to look at us. Most of them were allies of mine. Several heroes moved closer to help me. Not that I needed it. Henchman has no real defenses to a psionic attack.

"Ok, Cue Ball. You're a friend of Maggie so I'll forget it this time. But - Do - Not - Piss - Me - Off." He released my jacket and I fell back into the chair. "Jerk," he muttered.

He and Maggie left the party shortly after that. I know it was petty of me, but I placed a mental block in his subconscious. For the next few days, he's going to have a very hard time . . well . . let's just say, having any more fun with Maggie.

20 Comments:

Blogger Local Henchmen 432 said...

Yes I did have a hard time with Amber. Twice, it was really hard. Haw haw, sucker.Also I took $600 from your wallet.

Dental for all.

Dr.Polaris rules.

10:35 PM  
Blogger Vegeta said...

just do what I do, tear his arm off. He'll leave you alone then

11:31 PM  
Blogger KODIAK THE UNCANNY said...

heh heh!

3:01 AM  
Blogger Professor Xavier said...

A little defensive there, Hench? Must have hit close to the bone. So to speak.

6:00 AM  
Blogger Darth Nepharia said...

(Scratches head) What does Amber SEE in him if he's always acting like that?

7:32 AM  
Blogger L>T said...

Does this mean there is going to be a fight??

Sorry about all that troll nastiness over at my blog, professor I hope it didn't put you off? That's what I was going to ask your help about, but I think I can take care of it myself. Nice to know you are there, anyway.

10:18 AM  
Blogger Jon the Intergalactic Gladiator said...

Darth Nepharia said...
What does Amber SEE in him if he's always acting like that?

That confounds me as well, Darth N. Clearly he is a powerful villain who can summon demons. On top of that, he has powerful cyborg body parts and super strength. He uses these abilities to lift people's wallets and do the bidding of some other villain, though -- classic underachiever. He'll never ammount to anything if all he's concerned about is petty cash and a good dental plan.

Then again, I've only had 3 hours of psychology in college, what do I know.

10:44 AM  
Blogger L>T said...

professor i forgot about the code!

Ccepjre6`lnenjeilj6e6bjenb/enmjggef efn; e''"eflehpegfli *eC;heljneh/lnfjlflaebf el`h/ep/n*

10:51 AM  
Blogger Magdalena said...

Guy I thought it was only 300


and Neph and Jon... Guy aka Henchman doesnt act exactly like that (Charles exaggerates a bit) and Charles wasnt as nice as he claims either ;)

I believe I can bring Guy to the side of good besides the night time activity is alot of fun


remember Charles was cheating as Miss Tart (he is a womanizer) :P

11:40 AM  
Blogger Erifia Apoc said...

I think you still love her Prof. If that wasn't obvious enough already.

11:52 AM  
Blogger A.R.B.II said...

HEY BALDINI, NEXT TIME THEY HAVE A PARTY OR U DO. TRLL THEM TO HIRE A REAL BAND, ERR, LIKE MINE!

11:55 AM  
Blogger A.R.B.II said...

ERRR, TELL.

OH AND YOU DON'T WANT TO KNOW WHAT YOU'RE DAMN 'Word Verification' THINGY JUST HAD ME TYPE OUT, IN FACT I DON'T KNOW THAT I CAN SAY IT ON A COMMENT, OK OK OK I'LL TELL YOU IT MADE ME TYPE OUT *censored* ISN'T THAT A HOOT!

11:58 AM  
Blogger L>T said...

Our relationship is strictly platonic.


i can't hold him still long anough to work my feminine wiles.
I flirt with him...he gets away.
That's what happens when you don't have super powers ;]

12:21 PM  
Blogger Jean-Luc Picard said...

Wev do seem to have a pair of rivals for Magdelena's affections

2:12 PM  
Blogger Summer Dawn O'Ciardha said...

But what can you do, Captain Picard Sir. My suggestion is to simply crush the Henchmans' inferior brain with your abilities Professor. That is at least how my father would handle it.

3:53 PM  
Blogger Kon-El said...

Maggie said believe I can bring Guy to the side of good

Kon Says BWHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAA! That's the dumbest thing I've ever heard. I'm gonna give ya some advise here Maggie because well I'm a good guy Ya can't change people women you can't change the men in your life. because people don;t change.

4:04 PM  
Blogger Janus said...

Scarcely Summer. Diplomacy is key, Professor. Countinue not crushing his inferior brain.

4:09 PM  
Blogger Poison Ivy said...

Violence is never the answer.

There are oh so many more easy ways to rid yourself of pestering rivals. ;-)

5:04 PM  
Blogger Nicole said...

Aren't there other women to be having fun with besides Maggie?

6:49 PM  
Blogger L>T said...

well I'm certainly not going to fight anyone for him!

8:33 PM  

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