Thursday, October 06, 2005

Apparently Mastermind managed to hack into the internet from the federal detention center he is currently housed in and took down the servers for this computer system yesterday. Anyway, everything seems to be back online now. Hopefully there won't be any long term effects.

Things are starting to get back to normal around here since Jesse Jackson and his Rainbow/PUSH coalition ended their siege. Of course, I had to pay an exorbitant amount of extortion to get them to leave me alone. I am in contact with those in the legal community to see what my options are.

The other piece of good news is the change in Nightcrawler. As you may recall, Kurt has a bit of problem when it comes to controlling his baser impulses regarding the young ladies here at the mansion. He actually spent a couple of weeks in the local jail because of it. Gaia and Emma managed to set aside their differences and work together to help "fix" Kurt's personality. I just had a little chat him in my office.

"Guten tag, herr Professor," he said. The first thing I noticed was his rather affable and confident smile. Normally he's a bit of a shadowy lurker.

"Hello Kurt, thanks for coming. How are you feeling?"

"Oh, I am moztly recovered from zee beating zee girls gave me zee other day," he said with a knowing wink.

"And, um, how do you feel about the girls?" I asked.

"I zertainly understand vhy zhey did it," he answered. "I have no malice to zhem."

"Well, that's very good. But I mean, how do you feel about them?"

"I don't know vhat you mean, herr Professor?"

"What I mean is, are we going to have any, um, repeats of the behavior that lead to you arrest?"

"Heavens no, Professor! I have only zee greatest respect for zee vomen, young or old. I vould never do anything to offend zee ladies. Zhey, after all, are zee superior gender. Zhey are zee masters and I zee slave. I live only to serve zee ladies and vill obey zheir commands in all things."

"Oh, I see," was all I could say.

"Vomen are perfect. Zhey deserve only our meager adoration and praise. I vould never act in any way zhat could displease zhem. I am a nothing before them."

The thing that I found most surprising about his self-abasing statements was that he said them with such a confident, serene voice. Like he was happy to be a subordinate, a "slave" to all women. He took satisfaction that he was an inferior to them. Spooky.

Gaia and Emma certainly did an impressive job with Kurt. I don't see him doing any peeping on the girls anytime soon. Thank you, ladies.


Blogger Jon the Intergalactic Gladiator said...

Say, Professor, I have

super powers, perhaps sometime we could have a meeting?

9:04 AM  
Blogger Professor Xavier said...

I see that you are a mutant, who has the power to not be detected by any means as a mutant. That would explain why Cerebro has never detected you. You also seem to be skilled at talking to dogs. That might be useful in communicating with the Beast. He has been developing a bit of a prima donna attitude since his personality adjustment. I see you also have quite a bit of combat experience.

12:05 PM  
Blogger Helen Louise said...

Mastermind? Hey... do you support Manchester United by any chance?

2:22 PM  

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