"Having trouble, Charles?" Magneto asked as he and his Brotherhood strode into the large room.
"What took you so long, Eric?" I asked.
"Oh, you know how it is. Finding a parking place this time of day can be such a bitch."
Magneto raised his hand and the metal containment unit in the center of the room holding Scarlet Witch, Sabertooth, Quicksilver, Emma Frost and Polaris flew apart into hundreds of pieces. As the metal components started to fly around the center of the room, the four Horsemen moved in on Magneto. The Blob stepped between them.
"I'll handle lard-ass," Oprah said with a sneer.
"You should talk, wide-load."
Oprah pointed at the Blob and large waves of pure force shot out, smashing into his flabby belly. The jumbo sized mutant barely seemed to notice.
"Ha!" he shouted. "Nothin' moves the Blob, you fat cow."
Steam started to radiate from her ears and sparks shot from her eyes. Oprah began spinning around, releasing tremendous amounts of energy. A vortex opened up between her and the Blob. It looked like it opened up into the nothingness of deep space. The cosmic breech expanded, moving closer to the Blob.
Just then Exodus unleashed a ferocious blast of psionic energy at Oprah. The mental assault caught her off balance and she lost control of the vortex. It suddenly snapped back on her, sucking her and the other Horsemen out into some farflung corner of the galaxy.
As the X-Men got back to their feet and the newly freed prisoners joined their comrades, all eyes turned to Apocalypse, who suddenly seemed nervous. His eyes glanced quickly around the room, perhaps looking for the nearest exit.
"I am not looking for an exit, you worm!" he bellowed. "I don't need those fools! I am overflowing with the power of Harmonic DNA! With it I shall I infuse the core of the Earth with enough energy to raise the surface temperature to an average of 150 degrees Fahrenheit! All the weak chaff will parish and only the strong shall survive! HA HA HA!!"
We all looked at each other for a moment.
"That is your big plan?" I asked with disbelief. His inane cackling just continued. "And may I ask, why is it you always care so much about the strong surviving? What difference does that possibly make to your life? How does that help you?"
"Because then only the strong will be left and I shall rule them!"
"Yes, but why not just try and rule everyone? Why kill most of the people first?"
"Because I am so great, it would demean me to rule over lesser, unworthy beings."
"You are demented, aren't you," I responded. "Eric?"
Magneto smiled and gestured with his hand. The large machine he had assembled above Apocalypse out of the components of his energy draining confinement unit began to hum. Like a giant vacuum cleaner, all of the Harmonic DNA began to drain from Apocalypse.
He screamed his objections but Jean and Exodus and the other telekenetics held him firmly in place. As the stolen energy was sucked out of him, his body began to shrink in size. By the time Magneto turned off his machine, all that was left was a frail little Egyptian man. Wolverine walked over to him, claws out.
"Not today, Logan," Magneto said. "I have plans for this one."
Sabertooth snatched the former dark lord up and the Brotherhood left.
"Well Gaia," I said, "it looks like another adventure is resolved. How are you liking being an X-Man?"
"It certainly isn't dull, Professor. I wonder what lies ahead for us?"
"Only tomorrow will tell, my dear. Only tomorrow will tell."