Thursday, May 04, 2006

We followed the tracer I had hidden on Maggie's suit to the desert planet Tantooine. We pinpointed her location in a sprawling stone compound. When we got down to the ground, I could sense several weird alien lifeforms in the complex. Obviously we were going to need a plan. So Wolverine went howling through the front entrance, claws out, hacking and slashing at everything in sight.

"So much for subtly," I said to the others.

"Oh, it just makes me so mad how he won't listen to orders!" Scott whined. "I'm going to make him take a time out!"

"Once he's done doing what he does, Scott," I told him. "It may not be pretty, but he's quite good at it."

Wolverine, um, disposed of various obstacles, I followed the tracer signal inside. When I opened the cell door, I found a a rather hard edged woman wearing Maggie's suit. It was one of the pirates who had kidnapped Maggie and stolen the Sapphire!

"Hello, lover boy," she said lacisviously as she pointed a blaster at me. I hit her with a psionic attack to her cerebral cortex. She folded up like a kitten. Wolverine, um, questioned a couple of the guards and we soon found where Maggie was being held - the Throne Room.

Our team rushed into the large chamber, crowded with strange looking creatures as well as Corsair and his three pirate buddies. Maggie was sprawled out in front of some kind of giant yellow slug like creature. She had the most amazing outfit on. I was frozen by the sight of her.



Suddenly I became aware of a deep booming laugh. It seemed to be coming from the slug. Some weird creature with giant gross fleshy tubes wrapped around his neck stood next to the slug, whispering in his ear.

"Charles, you've come to rescue me!" Maggie called out.

"Master, this is the one the pirate Corsair told us about," the guy with the flesh tubes around his next said. "Charles Xavier, the mutant."

"I must be allowed to speak to you, oh large slug-like one," I said in my most authoritarian voice.

"He must be allowed to speak," I made the neck-tube freak say.

"Oh, you weak minded fool!" the slug spat, slamming his rather puny looking fist into neck-tube. "He's using an old mutant mind trick on you!"

I reached into the slug's mind. He was as gross inside as out. "You will release the girl to me."

"Your mind powers won't work on me, boy!" he boomed with a guttural laugh.

"Nevertheless, I am taking the hot slave chick and the Sapphire of Radiance. You can either profit by this or be destroyed. It's your choice, but I warn you not to underestimate my power."

"You may be a strong mutant, but now you are Bantha fodder!" the slug said. He motioned to his soldiers to cut us down.

As Cyclops unleashed his full force optic blast into the main force of the guards, Rogue sped like a bullet, smashing into the ones on the far wall. Angel swooped high into the center of the room, creating a distraction. Meanwhile Wolverine leapt onto the slug and turned him into Sushi.

Corsair's pirate friends ran out the back door. Corsair started to run after them but Maggie tossed the chain attached to her neck collar around his legs and he fell down hard. I reached into his mind and made him think he was a six year old girl. Scott looked a little distressed to see his father like this, but he recognized it was for the best. After I altered his brain, of course.

I hurried over to Maggie and she gave me a big hug.

"We are definitely keeping that outfit," I told her.

8 Comments:

Blogger Vegeta said...

I always wondered about the infatuation Hutt's had for Human like Women. they are slugs, not humanoid

12:07 AM  
Blogger SHI said...

sends and invite.... for the Galleries Auction

3:23 AM  
Blogger Magdalena said...

okay I am ready to run off to this gladiator thing


maybe one last moment alone before I go ;)

3:58 AM  
Blogger Professor Xavier said...

What can I tell you, Vegeta, slugs have good taste. Who would have thought?

9:20 AM  
Blogger Jawa Juice said...

Hutt sushi?
Man, that's a lot of sushi!

5:51 PM  
Blogger Jardena said...

a lot of sushi that looks even worse than sea urchin sushi, ick :P

8:17 PM  
Blogger jurassicpork said...

Hey, where'd you find that kewl picture of Lee R. Raymond?

8:17 PM  
Blogger Professor Xavier said...

Apparently he's using his insane Exxon profits to build a palace full of hot slave girls for himself.

8:30 PM  

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